Today, I’d like to share with you a story. It’s a good story (for me) and I think you’ll like it. I’m certainly going to enjoy telling you it…:
Once upon a time, there was a lovely, somewhat geeky but incredibly charming (!), teenage girl (me, obviously) who had an unapologetically massive crush on an established, talented and bloody dreamy actor called Peter Davison (yes, it’s one of these. Have fun).
Having watched all of Peter Davison’s adventures in the TARDIS, most of his Doolittle-esque antics with the Farmyard Creatures (both Great and, indeed, Small) and drooling over his mischievous attempts at succeeding as a big-shot Doctor in a small Island off the coast of the UK (off the Distant Shores), this girl – let’s call her Sophie, just because 😉 – heard through the geek-vine that this wondrous actor was finally making a (rare) appearance at a Doctor Who convention. Well, she had to go, lest she miss the opportunity to swoon, blush and, of course, stutter nervously at the man she had admired for so long (about 18 months. A long old time in teenage girl terms, right?)!
So… Off she wobbled, crutches and wheelchair (ripe for the sympathy vote) in hand, and suitably red faced, to the convention that would give her the chance of a life-time.
What was that she saw, perched discreetly on the edge of a sales stool on the day that would change her life forever (you know, the day she would inevitably embarrass herself in front of the established actor she’d watched for so long in awe)? An untouched, unused piece of Peter Davison, Doctor Who, original 1980’s wall paper. Well, it must’ve been fate! Sophie had to have it and get it signed by him in order that she could then show off to all her friends (who, of course, wouldn’t have a clue who he was).
Waiting in the long and, somewhat epic, queue for photographs and autographs with the legend that still is, and planning lots of cool, charming and normal-person type things to say to him for the entire wait, our heroine got to the front, standing with crutches in hand, in front of the beautiful Peter Davison, her mind went blank, her face scarlet and blotchy and her vocal cords shrivelled with nerves, completely unwavering….
All she could say to the intelligent, talented, charismatic actor she’d so long adored was the following:
“I’m your biggest fan, Mr Davison!”
Yeah, cool (!).
However, this was the end result:
Notice the shiny, sweaty forehead, coupled with the oh-so-gorgeous blotchy face and neck?
Yeah, good job making the man feel uncomfortable love (!)
Needless to say, they didn’t live happily ever after.
But I did get this SUPER COOL photograph.
Moral of the story? Don’t celebrity-stalk. Someone always ends up red-faced and speechless.